The Super Magical Meat Adventure!!!
by MountainDewChikita
Summary: It's funny, I laughed. Sesshis-poo needs his bacon bits or he will dieeee. I wrote it, mom was proud.


Muahaha! My first Inu Yasha fanfic! Hoo-rah. Ummm a little bit of teasing at Sesshomaru's expense. Even  
I as I read this story over and over again I get the giggles. Oh yeah, I don't own any of the Inu Yasha characters   
they belong to the Super Fabulous Rumiko Takahashi. I tried not to use the Japanese language, mother, but it was soooo  
tempting. Besides the fansubs/Manga make me giddy with feelings of happy! I am now a cow. Fooooo!  
  
***********  
  
Sesshomaru licked his chops as he rolled over in his sleep. "Mmm yum bacon bits."  
  
Jaken came running in "Sesshomaru-sama, Sesshomaru-sama, Sesshomaru-SAMA!!!"   
  
"Damn you, I heard you the first time, I'll kill you if you do that again. Bwa ha. Now what do you want?"  
  
"Oh your tail, it is soooo fluffy!" Jaken said reaching out to touch Sesshomaru's tail.  
  
"Touch it and die." Sesshie said, a vein popping out on his head. "What do you want for Pete's sake, you woke me   
up from such a lovely dream..."  
  
Jaken fumbled about, "Yes Sesshomaru-sama, Inu Yasha has challenged you to a fight."  
  
"Bah, I don't have to follow that idiot's orders, let him come here and make a fool out of himself. I do not bow to his request."  
  
"Do you ever think you and Inu Yasha should get counseling?" Jaken asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"WHAT???" Sessho looked stunned.  
  
"Hai. I've heard of sibling rivalry but I think you two have carried this thing a little too far. I know a family   
relationship is going really bad when two brothers fight all the time, but it's even worse when they hack off each   
other's arms, punching fists through each other, trying to kill each other..."  
  
"Are you feeling ok Jaken? You have never spoken to me in this way ever."  
  
"Sorry sir, I was having a philosophical moment."  
  
"S'ok. Now where can I get my hands on some bacon bits?"  
  
"I believe Kagome has some." Jaken suggested.  
  
"YAY!" Sesshie danced.  
  
"...but you'd probably have to fight Inu Yasha to get them."  
  
"Oh poo." Sesshoumaru clenched his fist. "Normally, I would reserve my pride and ignore the halfling's request,   
but for bacon bits? How can I refuse?!?"  
  
"I can see your dilemma sir." Jaken nodded wisely.  
  
"I guess I have but one choice!" Sesshomaru declared.  
  
"To fight Inu Yasha to get the Shikon no Tama, and Tetsusaiga?" Jaken suggested.  
  
"No, fool! To underhandedly steal Kagome's bacon bits."  
  
"So desu yo." Jaken said sweatdropping.  
  
Sesshoumaru dragged Jaken into Kaede's village that night. "Now where is that Kagome? Better yet, where is her backpack?"  
  
"I think they usually sleep at Kaede's house lord Sesshomaru-sama."   
  
"Good job Jaken, here is a cookie."  
  
"Waiiii!"  
  
"Now shut up."   
  
"O-chay"  
  
They snuck stealthily up to Kaeda-baba's house. Once inside they both saw Kaede, Kagome, Inu Yasha, Shippo,  
Myoga, and Miroku all sleeping peacefully.  
  
"I shall devour their freshly butchered livers." Sesshomaru declared, eyeing the group hungrily.  
  
"You've got this show confused with Zenki again, lord Sesshomaru-sama." Jaken corrected him.  
  
"Oh, uh hah hah. I meant to do that." Sessho gave out a hearty laugh which woke everyone up.  
  
Kagome shrieked, Inu Yasha growled, Shippo quivered, Myoga ran away, Miroku grabbed his staff, and all this   
movement gave Kaede constipations.  
  
"Give me your bacon bits wench! I need them for my salad, and they plague my dreams of bacony deliciousousness!"   
Shessomaru pointed at Kagome.  
  
Kagome blinked, "Is that all?"  
  
"Si, Senorita. Tu esta mucha bella!" Sesshou said kissing his fingers.  
  
"What language was that? And did you just say that I was beautiful???" Kagome was confused.  
  
"No, I said that you stink of old cheeses." Sesshou corrected her.  
  
Inu Yasha roared, "You have insulted Kagome." he paused. "Do it again."  
  
"See you two can get along!" Jaken cheered.  
  
Miroku cleared his throat, "I think we should all enjoy a delicious bacon bits salad."  
  
"But I'm a vegetarian!" Shippo protested.  
  
"That's not what your mother said last night!" Miroku countered, and pinched Kaede's bum.  
  
"Oh fresh!" she said, thwacking Miroku with her cane.  
  
Inu Yasha put his arms around everyone and said "I think we have all learned a very important lesson today.   
When bacon bits are involved everyone gets together and feels a little special."  
  
"Or it could be my constipations again." Kaede said.  
  
Everyone laughed and they were all good jolly friends, until Sesshomaru tried to kill Inu Yasha for serving him   
chocolate pudding instead of yellow pudding. 


End file.
